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how to transform grief

Grief and LossTransformation

Grief: The Way Out is In

(Navigating the Decline of My Mom - Story #1) It has been several months since I’ve had a good cry about my mom’s health decline from the effects of ALS (Lou Gehrig’s disease) and Pick’s disease (a form of frontal lobe dementia). Every time I think about her situation, I feel tears rise to the surface. I allow myself to cry briefly but then push my emotions back down, just to get through my day. As a result, I feel depressed and my energy feels heavy. From experience I know I need to release my grief to feel lighter and to be more present in my body and in my life. Over the past few months, it has become more and more challenging for my mom to speak. During my last visit with her at the full-time care facility where she lives, she mumbles her words so much that I…
Karen
February 5, 2020
AcceptanceGrief and LossLiving FullyPersonal growthTransformation

Expressing Grief Increases Vitality

Once a week my partner Mark and I meet for a “heart talk”. This is an opportunity for us to discuss vulnerable issues that may have come up for us during the week related to our relationship, usually the types of things that we would prefer to sweep under the carpet. Last week, Mark checked in with me about my work. I had had surgery ten weeks prior to have fibroids removed from my uterus and had allowed my business to drop. Six weeks after my surgery, my business picked back up, but I hadn’t done anything differently to market myself and I still had room for new clients. “Where are you at with your intentions for growing your business?” Mark asked. “But my business is growing!” I responded defensively. “I’m worried if I market my business too much right now, I will become overwhelmed.” Over a year ago, I…
Karen
September 27, 2019
AcceptanceGrief and LossTransformation

Angel on the Other Side

Saying Goodbye to Bucky -  Part Two (Scroll down to previous post for Part One) I thought I would feel relieved after putting Bucky to sleep, but I felt awful. Had he still wanted to live? Did we let him go too soon? Why did this happen this way? I hadn’t been ready to let him go. Perhaps if we had waited, I would have been more prepared. I regretted making such a quick decision. For several mornings, I woke up sick to my stomach. Bucky wasn’t asleep on my meditation chair, but tufts of his fur and fragments of litter were still there. His food dishes and litter box were sitting out. I felt a huge void in our home and couldn’t believe he was actually gone. It was like experiencing a nightmare from which I couldn’t awaken. I was astonished by how deep the pain was. How could…
Karen
November 12, 2012
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Karen Mehringer, MA, MFT - Grief support, counseling and life coaching in Santa Cruz area.